I’ve recently been having some thoughts on what “Being All In” really means. CLICK HERE to see Part One of this training.
Watch this training below to see part two my take.
The following are excerpts from Matt Poll Trading Secrets – Being All In (Part Two).
So being prideful would be the opposite of this.
Now many of you have taken Hell’s bait. You’ve taken this, maybe a payoff even. It might have seemed like a shortcut around pretending to look humble, versus your inner position being
humble.
As such, your inner position is what I call pride. So when we’re talking about backdoors, what does this have to do with creating a backdoor? Furthermore, what does this humble pride conversation have to do with this thing that I do around not fully committing? Or the way you would know you have a backdoor is you say you’re going to do things and it just doesn’t happen?
Well, a backdoor is a subconscious way that we commit, or we do not. It has our inner position as humble or prideful. It’s really fascinating. In fact, when we did this exercise, and we had this commitment, I was like “Hey, guys! You get to commit to this.”
It was fascinating to see the words that came out of people’s mouths that were their commitment, and how easy it was identify with certain people that they’d created the backdoor.
When prideful, we avoid being the fool, or not looking good. Which, ultimately has
us look really bad, doesn’t it? Because we don’t get what we want. And here’s all these people, these performers getting what they want. And ultimately, I’m not getting what I want.
I know To fail, I guess that way I didn’t have to look bad. But it’s like, ultimately you don’t get what you want, which looks really bad. So you never hit your goal. We create a backdoor that allows us to shift the responsibility off of us. Furthermore, we become victim. Maybe we enter the victim cycle. And we think this is okay. Because we can justify that this is how everyone else does it. So it must be it’s socially acceptable. And it’s true.
I would say that the majority of humans have come to this agreement that this is okay. It’s okay to be prideful. Additionally, it’s okay to not have to be the fool. It’s okay to just worry about looking good.
So here’s some examples I want to give you, I want to get you on the court around this and get you some examples of what a backdoor would look like. It’s “I will do, but you don’t give a date.” It’s like, yeah, I’m going to do that. And then you don’t give a time by which you’re going to do it. That would be a backdoor. Because like, it’s like, well, forever is my deadline. Or it’s like the best I know how I’ll do it the best I can.
Have you ever heard someone say that? I’ll try the best. I know how. It’s like, yep, there. There you go. There’s that backdoor, it’s your little language ad that you put into, it’s just in case you fail, you let everyone know that that was a possibility.
Failure was possible. or later, I’ll do it later. Or soon. I’ll do it soon or as soon as possible. And again, what do we avoid? The time we avoid the commitment around when you’re going to have it done by “Why would you do that?” I mean, it’s clear to see why we do it as humans. But why would you do that? Why would you rob yourself of a date that you could actually get this thing done rather than doing the thing we always do. But I’ve never done this before, I’ll do this, but just want to throw this disclaimer out there. I’ve never done this before. I’ve I’ve never done this before.
So I mean, you could probably count on I’m going to fail because it’s my first time. It’s like Why do that? Why add this thing into your why add the backdoor. Or I’ll do it as long as Oh, I love contingent commitments, I’ll do it. As long as you get your job done. Furthermore, as long as the price shows up, right? As long as they find the money. It’s like guys stop it. You don’t need a contingency around your commitment. It’s just like, I’ll do it. And this is when I’ll have it done by I’ll try my best is the fun one.
Notice how you’re off the hook psychologically, when you use a backdoor. Like notice, this is why we do it. This is why we create that backdoor when all there really is is what’s in front of us. It’s like you’ve padded some experience of failing. It’s like, it’s like, Okay, I know that I could fail. So I’m gonna, I’m gonna put some pads up. I’m gonna, you know, put a pool of water. So if I fall, it doesn’t hurt me as bad.
It’s like you’ve created this thing. That’s a total illusion. By the way, it’s not even a real pad. It’s still a cement wall that you think is going to help you from failing, which really what you actually did by creating a backdoor what you actually did is you created failing, you create it, you didn’t even pad it. You just removed failing altogether. How did you remove it because you just failed right out of the get go? Your commitment said I fail. That’s what happened.
So let me give you some backdoor examples. And we’re going to talk about smart goals through this. So it’s an extension of what we’ve been talking about. Backdoors are also goals or commitments that lack specifics. This is just the SMART goals training guys, specifics. measurability, they’re achievable or achievability.
There, they have to be realistic. And they’ve got to have timeliness. And so if your commitment around what you say you’re going to do is missing this, any part of this, then you actually created a backdoor.
So remember, if you can’t say it was complete. If you look into your future and go “Okay, I, at some future date, I could check this off and take it off a list. Or I could say it’s done.” If you can’t see it, if you can see yourself in that future and you can’t see that that’s possible, then you’re actually lacking something in your commitment.
Because a lot of us make commitments that have nothing to do with the actual commitment. They’ll have no impact because it’s not specific. It’s not measurable. Or you throw your it’s like this enormous goal. It’s even achievable. It’s not realistic, and you can’t get it done within a certain period of time.
So this is the one, this is the area that I really like. Because most of you, it’s like, oh, I don’t want to, you know, it’s hard to look at myself, you know, I don’t know, if I do this, it’s like, fine. But you know, it happens to you, right? Like those people that you get them to commit, or you try to get them to commit, and you’re just not getting commitment.
And I would say, for our performers who on here are way more powerful, internally with their own commitments. Furthermore, that’s why they can ask others for it. And let me show you what I mean by this.
So how many of you would like to be powerful with others, when asking them to commit, like, how many of you would like to be powerful, like, when you ask someone to commit, they actually do it? How many of you feel like you struggle with that, like, they’re not keeping their appointments, they’re not doing what they say they’re going to do?
And there’s something missing there. It’s like “gosh, if I just had a magic wand, I would wave it over them. And they would just do their commandments and keep them the way they said that they were going to keep them. I’d, I’d be winning at whatever it is.”
And this could be around clients, this can be around team members, this can be around the people that you work with, it can be your family, relationships, kids, like, anywhere you have a relationship, you might be struggling with this. And this could be around them making their appointments, that could be around appointments, it could be around steps to get them to commit to buy to upgrade, it could be really around anything.
So if you find you’re struggling with getting others to commit, it is because you are actually reflecting your ability to do so. And I know, I knew you guys wouldn’t like this. It’s like, Ah, this is me again. So this isn’t them? And the answer is like, absolutely. Your ability to get others to commit is a reflection of your own ability to do so.
Let me give you an example. If you struggle to commit, because you want to only commit to things, you know, you’ll win at Guess what? Guess what others will make requests from like, guess what am I What am I saying? You will know, you will win at Guess what? So others you make requests from app right? Exactly.
So the same thing we’ve been talking about. It’s if you’re playing small around your commitments, if you lack the skill set, or, or the courage to step into this, you will draw and expect the same level that you make around commitments from others.
So if you’ve been wondering, like, why aren’t people keeping their appointments? Why aren’t they committing? Furthermore, why aren’t they moving to the next step? And why can’t get my client to move to the next level? I see this other person, this other performer and they’re doing it. And it’s like, we’re getting the same leads, we’re getting the same people what’s happening, it’s likely that this is your thing, has nothing to do with your clients has nothing to do with how qualified The lead is. It has to do with you internally and your ability to commit.
So if you struggle to get others to actually do the assignment, it is likely that you let them create backdoors. And you’ll hear it in their agreement. Rather than hold them to something specific. You’ll let them slide by when they make their commitment. And they put in that back door. It’s like, Oh, yeah, that good enough. And it’s because you aren’t trained to hear it. You can’t even hear your own backdoors that you’re creating around your own commitments. So if people are non committal, guess what? It’s just a mirror.
What is happening and you’re expecting from other people, is a mirror of you guys. And I know a lot of you’re like, I am challenging this, I did not get this bad. I am saying that people, the same people that you deal with, when they come to me they keep their commitments, period, period. This same people, the same person that won’t keep a commitment with you will keep a commitment with me, the same person that’s not keeping your appointment over there will keep their appointment with me, the same person?
What’s the difference? It’s me versus you, right? And I’m not saying I’m just saying with appointments, I’m really good at this. There are other commitments and things I still fall into that victim cycle. But I’m just saying I want you to see the difference.
If there’s a higher level that you’re seeing over there with someone else. It’s not that your clients, it’s not your leads, it’s not the people you’re managing, it’s you. You’re the one and they’re just mirroring because you’re letting him off the hook. Furthermore, you’re not listening for that back door. You’re not calling him out on it like, Oh, no, I need a date. That’s not gonna work. I need a date. I need you to get specific around this.
No, no, that’s not measurable. Nope. I need something measurable and your commitment.
So often what is happening in the world out there is a reflection of what is happening in here inside of you specifically, you have no power to request something you have no power around. How would that be possible?
You will likely not even see it, or know to hold someone to a higher standard because you’re not there. That’s why it’s been happening. And it’s been so frustrating. That’s why it’s been happening. It’s like what needs to change? Are you starting to see it? Are you starting to see who gets to change? Who’s to blame that other people aren’t keeping their commitments? Who?
If you were 100% responsible? How could it be them? If you’re 100% responsible?
Right? It’s that whole conversation. The work here is always for you to do. Always guys and and that’s that’s really the probably the most powerful statement.
Anytime there’s something to be done anytime there’s something to be looked at. Anytime there’s something that’s wanted. It’s you. It’s not the world outside of you.
Contact us to learn more about Matt Poll Trading Secrets.
Matt Poll, AKA Matt Poll, is an entrepreneur, investor and life coach based out of Silicon Slopes in Lehi, Utah. Furthermore, he is the CEO of GTF, a company which he helped co-found in September of 2008.
In addition to this blog, you can find Matt Poll on social media by clicking the links below:
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